


A Rose By Any Other Name

by quirkyOne



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/M, Flustered Scott, Grumpy Derek, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Protective Derek, Suddenly Female Stiles Stilinski, WIP, amused pack, smarmy peter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:41:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22837219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quirkyOne/pseuds/quirkyOne
Summary: Due to a magic mishap Stiles now has bewbies. Strangeness ensues
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 5
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes I am still working away on my other fic but for some completely insane reason the urge to dip my toe into the pool of cliche fanfiction tropes seized me and wouldn’t let me go. So here you go.  
> Not betaed still.

The expressions facing Stiles ran the gauntlet from confused to completely aghast, and sadly that was not out of the norm for people’s reactions to him. What however were not normal were the perky breasts sitting small but quite proudly high up on his chest.

“Huh, those are new.” he mused almost to himself before his eyes rolled back, his knees unhinged and he face planted into the soft loamy soil surrounding the Nemeton.

“But...... how....., why are you naked? “ Scott asked confusion evident in his plaintive tone.

“Really Scott, that’s what you are choosing to focus on?” Derek’s acerbic reply was the last thing Stiles heard until he blinked his eyes back open in the sterile back room of Deaton’s Veterinary Clinic. Most of the pack seemed to be crowded together at the other end of the room conferring in low murmurs. 

“Nrrrrghh” Stiles stared up at the ceiling groggily watching the tiles sway drunkenly. Slowly fragments of the pack’s conversation began to register  
Taking a deep breath he pushed himself upright and his stomach immediately rebelled at the sudden change in position. A shockingly cold metal garbage can was shoved against his torso and he glanced up to see Lydia looking back with a carefully bored expression. Nodding curtly in thanks he pulled the heavy container closer and curled around it giving in to the heaves racking his body. 

“Ewwww, God Stiles” despite Lydia’s disgusted tone he felt her hand rub comfortingly on his bare back as he emptied the contents of his stomach into the small garbage can. The conversation at the other end of the room immediately ceased at the sounds of Stiles’ gastric distress. Then almost at once everyone started talking again louder.

“Guys he’s awake.” Scott needlessly pointed out.

“Stiles, what did you do?” Derek’s demand was a borderline growl. 

“Way to go Stilinski. I always knew you would do anything for attention.” Surprisingly there was a slight undercurrent of concern threaded through Jackson’s superior tone. 

“Does he know he’s got ti.....?” 

“Isaac!!” Alison hissed softly in reproach over the sound of someone, presumably Erika smacking the back of the smirking beta’s head.

The voices overlapped and blended together as Stiles took deep watery breaths the last of the nausea slowly fading away. 

“Mr. Stilinski can you tell me what happened?” Deaton efficiently removed the garbage container, handing over an opened box of Kleenex in its place.

“I don’t know.” Stiles pulled a few tissues from the box and wiped his streaming eyes before obnoxiously blowing his nose. He straightened up from his hunched position at the sound of Derek snorting in disbelief.

“I don’t know.” Stiles repeated firmly, glaring at the dark haired man. Derek said nothing in reply but rolled his eyes in disbelief.

“Fine, don’t believe me” he slammed his palm down on the gurney in frustration. Stiles raised his eyebrows in surprise as he felt an unfamiliar jiggling sensation in response to his angry action. Glancing down at his chest he gasped softly at the unexpected excess flesh and raised his hands to cup his apparently brand new breasts.

“Ooooooh riiiight these. It wasn’t a dream.” His hands tightened reflexively as a new thought occurred to him and he tore his right hand away to explore beneath the sheet pooled in his lap. Silence filled the room while his hand moved beneath the sheet before coming to a stuttering stop. “Dude, where’s my dick?” He glanced around his eyes wide and panicked.


	2. Chapter 2

Stiles sat in the passenger seat of the camaro his newly feminine form still wrapped up in the sheet from Deaton’s office. He watched as the streets passed by and realized they were heading towards Derek’s loft instead of his house. A large part of him was relieved that he wouldn’t have to face his father just yet. Hopefully with the help of some of the more arcane books at the loft he could figure out what happened and quickly return to normal or rather return to his own particular brand of normal. Maybe if he found a solution fast, his father wouldn’t even need to find out about this latest misadventure. Sure the sheriff was aware of werewolves and all the baggage that came with them but Stiles didn’t think his dad was in any way prepared to discover his son had suddenly, magically grown breasts and a vagina. Clearing his throat he chanced a side glance at Derek. The alpha was staring determinedly ahead at the road. He had a white knuckle grip on the steering wheel, his nostrils flared slightly with each inhalation, and his jaw was clenched tightly. 

“My uh, my Jeep....?” Stiles started to ask

“Scott’s bringing it to the loft” 

“Is he going to bring me some of his clothes?” Stiles adjusted his grip on the sheet pulling it tighter around himself.

Derek’s head whipped towards him pinning him with a brief unreadable glance before returning to the road. “No.”

“What? Why not? Seriously dude I need some clothes. I used to have nightmares about being naked in public and let me tell you this is so much worse.” Stiles indignantly wiggled an arm loose from his cocoon and gestured down at his body swathed in the sheet. 

“I’ll get you something to wear at the loft.” Derek’s tone was clipped signaling the end of that discussion. 

With a huff Stiles flopped back in the seat his right leg starting to jitter up and down. Obviously Derek was determined to be an extremely sour wolf about the whole situation. He seemed almost more upset than Stiles was and Stiles wasn’t entirely sure why. 

The rest of the short drive passed in silence and when they pulled up in front of the building Stiles’ Jeep was parked in front but Scott was nowhere in sight. Once the car stopped Stiles hopped out and began to gingerly pick his way across the gravel covered lot wincing as the jagged rocks bit into his bare feet. 

“Ow ow ow ow ow ow.........OH MY GOD!!” Stiles pained mutterings were cut off in a shriek as an impatient Derek swept him up into his arms and strode briskly towards the entrance. 

“Put me down, I can walk you know!” Stiles demanded breathlessly, clutching at Derek’s shoulders in surprise. 

“You’re barefoot.” Derek stated as if that explained everything. 

“Is this because I suddenly look like a girl? Because let me assure you I’m still me and I’m just as capable as I always was.” Stiles glared up at the Alpha.

A soft snort in reply was the only sign Derek heard him. Otherwise he looked straight ahead refusing to meet Stiles’ narrow eyed stare as he shouldered open the door to the building, crossed the vestibule and began to effortlessly climb the splintered wooden stairs to his loft.

‘I am so capable!” Stiles muttered to himself as he felt his face begin to flush, warming inexplicably. He shifted slightly in Derek’s hold. 

“Stop wiggling unless you want me to drop you.” Derek’s arms tightened warningly as he rounded a corner and began to climb the final flight of stairs. 

Carrying Stiles up the stairs hadn’t even fazed Derek, the realization that the man wasn’t the slightest bit winded caused Stiles’ pulse to begin to throb and he flushed even deeper in embarrassment. 

Stopping in front of the doors to his loft Derek set Stiles down beside him and slipped his key into the lock. His cell phone chimed as he slid the door open. Gesturing for Stiles to enter Derek pulled his phone out of his pocket and glanced down at the screen. 

“Scott and the others will be over in an hour with some food and stuff.” Derek disappeared into a small room just off of the kitchen and returned with a bundle of clothing that he tossed at Stiles. 

“Wait, are these dirty? Don’t you have anything clean I can wear?” Stiles fumbled with the clothing struggling to maintain his hold on the sheet covering his naked body. 

Derek raised his eyebrows pointedly staring him down in silence.

“Right...right. Beggars and choosers. I get it. Ok you’re the one with the super sensitive nose. If you don’t mind me smelling like your dirty laundry who am I to bitch about it?” Stiles hugged the bundle of clothes to his chest and stumbled towards the bathroom to get dressed.

“I’m going to call Peter. He has some more books that might help.” 

“Do you have to? He’s just going to laugh at me and be an ass about this.” Stiles stilled, his head drooping tiredly. 

“Sorry Stiles, we need those books.” Derek’s voice was soft and slightly regretful.

“Ok well if he gets too insufferable don’t be surprised if I kill him again.” Stiles squared his shoulders and continued on towards the bathroom. 

“I think I can now safely say that nothing regarding you surprises me.” Derek’s lips twisted into a brief smirk. 

“Oh look who just found their sense of humour, try not to strain yourself.” Stiles snarked as he flipped Derek off before slamming the bathroom door shut. 

Shaking his head in exasperated amusement Derek scrolled through the contacts on his phone. Taking a deep breath he selected Peter’s number and listened to the phone begin ring on the other end.


	3. Chapter 3

“Well now, this is definitely different.” A stack of books being placed on the coffee table front of him and a body settling lazily onto the couch beside him rudely tore Stiles’ attention from the ancient dusty tome propped up on his lap. Blinking rapidly as he surfaced from the obscure Latin text he turned his head to discover bright blue eyes staring back at him speculatively. 

“Gah, Zombie Wolf are you trying to kill me?” 

“Oh no, not at all sweetheart. Why would I do that when you suddenly, got even more interesting than usual.” Peter’s intent gaze slid over Stiles’ altered form leaving him feeling embarrassed, and oddly breathless. 

“Peter leave him alone.” Derek suddenly appeared in the doorway between the kitchen and living room glowering darkly at the older man.

“Oh Derek, nephew mine, where are your manners? You did after all ask for my help.”

“I asked you to return some of the books you removed from the vault, you can leave them and go.” Derek’s eyes flashed alpha red. 

“Well, since these books are actually mine and are quite invaluable I’m afraid you are going to be stuck with me for the duration..” Peter tapped the pile of books resting on the coffee table

“Great, just freaking great.” Stiles sighed tiredly scrubbing his hands over his face. 

Laser sharp blue eyes snapped back onto the teenager. “Oh I’m sorry sweetheart, did you want to stay like that? Can’t say I blame you. You’ve always been lovely, but you make an exquisite female.”

A soft growling from Derek’s side of the room filled the air as shock momentarily rendered Stiles speechless. His mouth hung open and his gaze darted between Peter’s smug casualness and Derek’s strangely tense form. With a shake of his head Stiles found his voice. “Wait just a minute, I’m not female.”

At Peter’s raised eyebrow and pointed gaze sliding over his body Stiles rolled his eyes and fought the urge to cross his arms over his chest to hide his recently acquired breasts from view. “Ok yeah, technically I’m female on the outside but inside I’m still me, and that is definitely male!”

Smirking Peter leaned forward, pressing partially into Stiles’ personal space his nostrils flaring slightly as he scented the air. “Oh I know, it’s all very intriguing.” He purred softly.

Derek’s rumbling growls increased in volume and there was a hint of too sharp teeth filling his mouth as he stalked forward. “Get away from him!”

Peter’s smirking, Stiles’ sputtering and Derek’s growling were interrupted by the door to the loft sliding open and the majority of the pack spilling noisily in through the entrance. Lydia and Allison followed in behind, each carrying a bulging bag filled to overflowing with different fabrics in various bright colours. 

“We got Chinese food” Scott said as he lifted the fragrant bags of food he was carrying. Receiving no immediate response he squinted in confusion before glancing around at everyone. “Did we miss something?” 

“No, nothing important.” Stiles sighed and pushed himself up off the couch. He hitched up the sagging oversized sweatpants he was wearing and headed towards the kitchen, grabbing Derek’s arm as he brushed part. “Come on, let’s get some plates so your starving wolves can eat.”


End file.
